This weight loss journey is not going to be easy for me. It isn't because I don't want to do what it takes but because it's basically like a drug addiction for me. I am a food addict. I use it for every emotion I feel. I would eat when I was "bored", happy, sad, joyful, depressed, or whatever other emotion. To put it simply. I eat because I can. I don't always overeat though. Most times I keep to a good portion and do make good choices. But when I make bad choices they are bad and I have even had moments of binge eating. This is something I have been battling now for at least 18 years now. In those 18 years I did have moments where I would lose weight but it would come back with a vengeance. My weight has fluctuated over the years. In 2016, I was at my heaviest weight and I managed to lose thirty pounds and thankfully I have managed to keep that off. Last year I started focusing on weight loss again and was doing well until hurricane Irma hit in September. With all that chaos, I fell away from my routine, AGAIN.
It is hard for me to tell you this because I spend so much time encouraging others with their goals and things they struggle with, yet here I am with this one of my own. I have already had an emotional breakdown while I was praying about it a couple of days ago. To me that is a good thing because the Lord always hears our cry. I know for a fact that it is impossible for me to change this issue on my own. The ONLY way I will get through this is with the Holy Spirit leading me through prayer and the word of God because right now all I want to do is say forget it! It is always easier to quit than it is to keep going. However, I am refusing to quit because I want to show others who have the same struggle that they CAN do this. I have overcome other things in my life so I know I can do this and I am tired of making excuses for it.
This is a personal growth area that the Lord has been working in me for some time now. I am pretty certain that I can no longer ignore the direction He is leading. I can be stubborn sometimes and it takes a bit to finally get it through my thick skull. I can no longer say "I'm fine with just how it is" anymore because I'm not.
I am not okay with the high blood pressure and the high risk of diabetes. I am not okay with how I look, not because I think outward appearance is most important, but because I am not in the body that God wants me in because it is not a proper dwelling for Him. My body doesn’t belong to me. It belongs to Him and I am to be a good steward of what He has given me responsibility for. I have failed miserably at it!
1 Corinthians 6:19-20 KJV
What? Know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's.
What is even more amazing about this is that He continues to provide the tools I need to make it happen yet I have continually kept them hidden in the tool box and asked for more tools! I have to laugh at that. We are so guilty of asking for help but completely oblivious to the solutions right in front of us! I have access to awesome weight loss supplements that will help me get on track and stay on track (that is how I lost those thirty pounds in 2016). Through the same place, I know have free access to all the support I can handle along with workout routines and recipes. That came along unexpectedly at the end of 2017 after I had been praying for something that would keep me focused.
It is scary telling you all of this because know you will be watching me to see if I am going to make the change that I say I will. Guess what? That’s okay because it will mean accountability on my part and it will mean that I can be human and share the struggle with you along the way. We don’t have to be perfect and make 100% changes. A 1% change each day adds up. We will also never be perfect as long as we live on this earth but we do have to continue to grow as long as we are on this side of our heavenly home.
Matthew 5:48 KJV
Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect.
I hope that this has encouraged you in some way. If you struggle with weight loss as well, reach out to me so we can encourage and help each other!